Vaccine-o-Rama
It’s Kentucky Derby time again and all the enthusiasm may have caused one of the horses to break through his gate early; CBS News’ Charlie D’Agata recently announced that the Coronavirus vaccine produced by Oxford University and AstraZeneca might be ready in September. That’s now, right? The companies themselves said more like November 3rd, also known as Dump Trump Day in the United States and Guam. Just think---you might be able to get your shot and give the prez his on the same day. Who said synchronicity is dead?
This revelation comes from the venerable Serum Institute in Pune, India, one of the companies that will manufacture the product, which will be launched 73 days after the start of Phase 3 trials, likely November 3. The Serum Institute, a leading vaccine manufacturer, is partnering with Gavi---the Vaccine Alliance---and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation to manufacture and deliver up to 100 million doses of Covid-19 vaccines in India and developing countries.
The vaccine will be administered in a single dose. Pascal Soriot, CEO of AstraZeneca, has said that the vaccine is already being produced and millions of doses will be ready for distribution as soon as it’s approved. The company is taking a financial risk that the results of the trials will be positive. Phase I and II trials have been successful. The price of the vaccine, according to AstraZenica, will be about three euros or 1.18 U.S. dollars. We’ll believe that when we see it.
There’s quite a disparity in projected prices for the different vaccines which are on their way. Sinopharm’s Chinese vaccine will cost 120 euros, GSK-Sanoff’s product around 10 euros and Moderna’s close to 30. Walmart’s generic brand will cost 99 cents but must be self-administered and is only effective until your next shopping trip.
Portland Secedes
Portland, Oregon, a modest city of 653,115 has announced that it will secede from the United States with all due haste. The Pacific Northwestern metropolis (motto: Homeless Anarchists ‘R” Us) has long been a hotbed of revolt, uberioting and burning stuff in the streets. Asked what he was protesting against this morning, a black-clad sign-carrier named Humpty Dumpty asked, “Whattaya got?”
Mayor Ted Wheeler, the last in a long chain of ineffective chief executives said, “Gee, fellas—I don’t know what to tell you. We give them everything they want; three hearty meals a day, free transportation around town, thrice-weekly garbage pickup and the best bunny slippers you ever saw. But it’s never enough. I can’t understand what we’re doing wrong.”
As a result of the secession, Portland will be fenced up, detoured around and replaced by Omaha. “We were just pretty damn tired of being in Nebraska,” said spokesman Warren Buffett, “so this works out great for everyone.”
Batman Lives!
The Caped Crusader has been played by so many different actors it’s hard to tell the true Batman from the frauds, but the people in Santiago, Chile think they have the real McCoy. He’s not much at solving crimes, but the Chilean Batman is doing a great job battling hunger. In his sleek white SUV Batmobile, fully stocked with a cargo of hot meals, he dons a shiny black costume replete with a cape and two masks (one with pointy comic-book ears and eye-slots, the other for Covid-19 protection) and rides the streets of Santiago, rendering sustenance.
The city has started calling him the “Solidarity Batman,” but titles are of no consequence to this superhero. “Look around you,” he told Reuters News. “See if you can dedicate a little time, a little food, a little shelter and some words of encouragement to those who need it.” One grateful recipient of Batman’s largesse, Simon Salvador, shook his head in wonder as the superhero rode off into the sunset. “He’s like the Lone Ranger,” said Salvador, “but without the silver bullets.” Long live his fame and long live his glory and long may his story be told.
Namaste, Y’all!
Chalk up another coup for yoga, the cure for what ails ya. A study of 538 patients has found the ancient Indian form of exercise almost halved the number of symptoms among people with Atrial Fibrillation. As the yogis in Dharamshala like to say, put that in your hookah and smoke it.
The study’s lead author, Dr. Naresh Sen, said “Our study suggests yoga has wide-ranging physical and mental health benefits for patients with atrial fibrillation and could be added on top of the usual therapies.”
The patients attended 30-minutes sessions involving postures and breathing every other day for 16 weeks. They were also encouraged to practice the same movements and other routines at home on a daily basis. This gentle form of exercise led to dramatic improvements in all areas. For example, when not doing the exercises participants experienced an average of 15 symptomatic bouts of AF; this was reduced to 8 during yoga. The average blood pressure also fell significantly.
Atrial Fibrillation is a potentially fatal condition that causes palpitations, breathlessness, dizziness, fatigue, chest pain and a racing pulse. One in four middle-aged adults in Europe and the U.S. will develop AF, which causes up to 30% of all strokes, though far fewer
for the Downward Doggies.
New Hope For The Dead
There’s still hope for ballroom dancing. The Aral Sea, once left for dead, is now brimming with life thanks to an unusual global collaboration. Kissing the borders of Uzbekistan and Kazakhstan, the North Aral Sea is experiencing a rare ecological resurgence following a long period of decline thanks to an $86 million project financed by the World Bank. Workers repaired extensive damage to dikes and constructed an 8-mile dam, raising water levels by 11 feet in just 7 months, going far beyond scientists’ hopes of a rise over 3 years.
The Kokaral dam’s erection south of the Syr Darya River has proven the catalyst for an incredible comeback in local fish stocks. The sea’s recovery has also led to a reduction in local disease rates from formerly-contaminated drinking water.
Once the fourth-largest freshwater lake on Earth, the Aral Sea shrank dramatically in the 1960s after rivers which fed it were diverted by evil Soviet irrigation projects---so much so that it divided into the North and South Aral seas. When this occurred, increased salinity in the water led to the die-off of several fish species like bream and perch, leaving the resilient flounder as the only animal capable of dealing with the high salt content. Fish harvests fell from 48,000 a year to (gulp) zero.
“When I was born,” said Kambala Balyk Processing Plant supervisor Askar Zhumashev, “the sea was already gone. My parents used to tell me about the time when the boats would go in and out every day from the old port. I came back to the Aral Sea only two years ago.” Askar and his team now process over 500 tons of fish a year and the area is booming. “We are growing every day,” Zhumashev exulted. “We are ready to do more and more business with the world!” So far Disneyland sources have announced no plans for the area.
Rainforest Redux
That Topher White is really a scamp. In 2011, while volunteering at a wildlife sanctuary in Indonesia, Topher realized that the rainforest is such a sound-rich place that rangers could simply not hear illegal loggers taking down trees within minutes of the ranger stations. They needed a new technology to save the rainforest from disappearing forthwith. Never one to shy from a challenge, Topher White whipped out his slide-rule and got to work. He formed the Rainforest Connection, which began gathering up old, unused cell phones wherever they could find them. The phones were then installed high up in rainforest trees, obscured by the tree canopies. If the old phones hear so much as the hum of a chainsaw, the solar-powered listening devices immediately alert local authorities in the area where the illegal logging is taking place.
White estimates that one device in a tree can help protect three square kilometers of forest. “That equals taking 3000 cars off the road and 15,000 tons of CO2,” he says. “Climate change is something we cannot just wait to solve. One-fifth of carbon emissions comes from illegal logging. The cell phones offer the local tribes one of the best ways to use technology. We basically take an old cellphone and put it in a box. Using the powerful microphone in most smartphones, we can listen to the sounds of the forest, detect chainsaws and alert the local people. Using satellites to monitor the forest for signs of deforestation is too slow to halt the destruction. This real-time response is getting the job done. People from all over are digging through their draws, finding their old phones and donating them. Every day the inventory grows. We’re putting a huge dent in the wallets of the tree pirates.” As a special bonus, sometimes Al Gore even calls.
Alzheimer’s, the disease that keeps on taking, may finally have met a challenging foe. A protective protein called LANDO (LC3-associated endocytosis) was found to be less abundant by half in the brains of people with dementia, according to findings of a new study published in Science Advances.
The study’s senior author, Dr. Douglas Green, an immunologist at St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital in Memphis, said “We learned about this pathway in the context of brain tumor research. But it has major implications for neuro-inflammatory and neuro-degenerative disease. We have shown that a deficiency in LANDO combined with aging can lead to Alzheimer’s disease in a unique mouse model and there is evidence suggesting this could also be the case in humans.”
Previous research by the same team found LANDO inside microglial cells, the primary immune cells of the brain and central nervous system. When its genes were deleted, Alzheimer’s accelerated in lab rodents. The tests also found LANDO protects against neuro-inflammation, a hallmark of the disease. It functions like a car wash to prevent the buildup of a toxic protein called beta-amyloid that kills neurons, causing memory loss and confusion. The newly identified pathway could also yield strategies for unleashing the immune response against malignant brain tumors. Much of the data on LANDO suggests that it could play a significant role in curbing various neuro issues. There is also a strong possibility that it could be targeted as a therapy against cancer or even infectious diseases that rely on similar processes for survival. Let's have a big whoopee for Dr. G.
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| Sometimes it's best to leave well enough alone. |
Yeah, But Where’s The San Diego Chicken?
Most true sports fans are depressed to watch their teams playing in arenas and stadiums where the wind whistles through tiers of empty seats. If it’s downright depressing to watch, imagine how the players feel: grand slam homer to win the game in the bottom of the ninth and only the crickets chirp. Japan’s avid baseball fans are no better off but now the Fukuoka SoftBank Hawks have dancing robots, at least. Before their most recent Nippon Professional Baseball League game against the rival Rakuten Eagles, over 20 robots danced to the team’s fight song on a podium erected in the grandstand. They stamped, they shimmied in a replica of a choreographed dance usually performed by 40,000 Hawks fans prior to ballgames.
Fans on social media had mixed reactions. “I think this is like a dystopia,” wrote one Twitter user. Another called the performance “insanely beautiful.” A third contended, “I’m embarrassed to death!” and he seemed to be in the majority. Nonetheless, boosted by the rowdy robots, the Hawks won 4-3 as they looked to defend their 2019 NPB title. Beginning soon, the robots will be put out to pasture as up to 5000 fans will be allowed to attend games due to an easing of restrictions.
“The fans better pick up the pace,” said one of the Hawk’s infielders. “We’re doing pretty good with the robots.”
That’s all, folks….
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