With all this new technology advice so readily available, it’s hard to know what to believe. Who has the Elixir of Life and who’s selling snake oil? Virtually all the product reviews are from their creators, often well-disguised as disinterested parties like the internet hotel “reviewers,” who rated Uncle Elmer’s rundown barracks “the coolest stop in Omaha.” Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.
There is, however, one entity whose dictates carry weight with me, and that’s the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. When we were kids, Butch Hart was the brightest bulb in our neighborhood, a straight-A student through high school who never lost an argument. No one was surprised when Butch was accepted into MIT but we were flabbergasted when he flunked out in less than a year. What kind of geniuses are roaming the campus when a guy like Butch can’t even hold on for twelve months? Then, not long after, a modest party of Tech students managed to roll the world’s largest snowball out onto busy Memorial Drive, stalling traffic for hours. The stuff of absolute genius. So whatever MIT tells me, I’m going to believe. What they’re telling me now is this:
What The Techies Think
Developing drugs for healthy longevity is one of the most complex areas in drug discovery, focusing on prevention rather than treatment and requiring complete optimization of health at the deepest level while targeting biological systems that control disease. Companies working in longevity drug development are more advanced than traditional biomedicine companies. In fact, they’re considered Next Generation because research and development integrates many scientific and technical subdomains including Artificial Intelligence, digital medicine and geroscience. Longevity companies also use very advanced methods of diagnostic and prognostic assessment and Next Generation techniques for conducting clinical trials compared to conventional standards which are largely based on results from vitro experiments and mice.
With aging, there is a buildup of cells that refuse to die and thus cannot be replaced. These cells have impaired cellular function, reduce tissue repair, accumulate mutations that can cause cancer, and increase chronic inflammation. This phenomenon of irreversible arrest of cell division cycles is called cellular senescence. Senescence is a universal process that affects almost all cells. With aging, immune reactivity declines and some senescent cells escape immune clearance. By the time humans reach old age, they have a massive accumulation of senescent cells. The long-term presence of senescent cells within tissues can potentially promote age-related diseases and may even promote aging itself.
Adam Piore of the MIT Technology Review writes: “The first wave of a new class of anti-aging drugs has begun human testing. The drugs won’t let you live longer---yet---but aim to treat specific ailments by slowing down or reversing a fundamental process of aging. These drugs are called senolytics. They work by removing certain cells that accumulate as we age. Known as senescent cells, they can create low-level inflammation that suppresses normal mechanisms of cellular repair and creates a toxic environment for neighboring cells.”
Piore cites trials from Unity Biotechnology and Alkahest as proof of progress. “Also keep an eye on Insilico Medicine, the pioneering artificial intelligence company powering information in the biopharmaceutical sector.”
Last September, Insilico published a paper in Nature Biotechnology detailing how it used artificial intelligence systems to create and validate a series of novel molecules that may eventually be used to treat disorders such as fibrosis and certain cancers in just 21 days, dramatically accelerating the drug discovery process and potentially saving millions of dollars.
Remember, however, that all of the above are research outfits which are likely to market any product resulting from their studies via another company. When you discover any promising new product on the market being sold under an unfamiliar name, always attempt to discern its credibility by finding out where the science came from. The trio above have the MIT seal of approval. That’s a good place to start.
Anti-Aging Aids Supported By Healthline
1—EGCG. Epigallocatechin gallate is a well-known polyphenol compound concentrated in green tea which offers impressive health benefits. Research supports its value in reducing the risk of heart disease and several cancers. EGCG may slow aging by restoring mitochondrial function in cells and acting on pathways involving aging. It also induces autophagy, the process by which your body removes damaged cellular material.
2---Collagen. A 2019 study of 72 women demonstrated that taking a supplement that contained 2.5 grams of collagen (along with several other ingredients, including biotin) each day for 12 weeks significantly improved skin hydration, roughness and elasticity.
3.---CoQ10. Many people already know about the benefits of this antioxidant, some of which your body produces. Some don’t. A study of 443 older adults demonstrated that supplementing with CoQ10 and selenium over 4 years improved their overall quality of life, reduced hospital visits and slowed the deterioration of physical and mental performance.
4.---NAD+. Nicotinamide riboside is the current Star of the Show. NAD+ is a compound found in every cell in your body. It is involved in many critical processes, including energy metabolism, DNA repair and gene expression. Alas, it declines with age and such reduction is thought to be associated with accelerated physical decline and the onset of age-related diseases like Alzheimer’s.
5.---Crocin. This is a lesser known yellow carotenoid pigment in saffron, a popular pricey spice commonly used in Spanish and Indian cuisines. Human and animal studies have shown that crocin offers a variety of health benefits, including anticancer, anti-inflammatory, anti-anxiety and antidiabetic benefits. Test-tube and rodent studies have demonstrated that crocin helps prevent age-related nerve damage by inhibiting the production of advanced glycation end-products and reactive oxygen species, which are compounds that contribute to the aging process.
Nobody can gobble down every available supplement, but you might want to examine which ones appear to be of particular benefit to you. Theanine, Rhodiola, Garlic, Astragalus, Fisetin and Resveratrol are worth a look. Or, if all this is too much trouble, just call David Sinclair and take whatever he tells you.
Do You Know The Way To San Jose?
Too many pangolins on your lawn? Call pest control. Looking for the best route to Pflugerville? Ask Triple-A. Need dope-growing instructions? Phone Timmy LeMasters. When a smart man has a question or two, he summons an expert for advice. Ergo, if you want to live to 100 or more, find a man who’s been there. Centenarians are more abundant than ever, streaking through The Villages in souped-up golf carts, groping Snow White at Disney World, looking for love in all the wrong places. Pull one aside, slip him (or more likely her) a twenty and ask him how he made it. You’ll hear stuff like this:
Agnes Fenton of New Jersey made it to 110 against all odds by preserving herself in alcohol. She drank three bottles of Miller High Life a day from age 40 on and somewhere along the line added Johnnie Walker Blue Label into the mix. “It’s not like I was a lush,” declared Agnes. “And it made the romances so much better.”
Jessie Gallan, an English woman, made it to 109 without romances. Matter of fact, that’s how she did it, according to Jessie. “Men are more trouble than they’re worth,” she huffed, just before her final birthday. “I make do with exercise, nice friends and hard work. I’ve been working since I was 13. People who sit on their arses don’t make it much past retirement.”
Duranord Veillard of New York made it to 108 by “eating right and exercise.” He starts each day with oatmeal, fruit and a cup of tea and ends it with fish and vegetables. “I have done five to seven pushups every day of my life, even now,” Duranold avers, winking at Jeanne, his wife of 82 years. Jeanne was 105 at the time. Any exercise for you, Jeanne. “You know,” she blushed, “just the usual up and down stuff men like.”
Adelina Domingues, a Californian, made it all the way to 114 by living pure as the driven snow. “I never fractured a bone,” she told the San Diego Union-Tribune, “and never needed to go to a hospital. I’ve never been to a beauty shop because I am not vain. I never smoked or drank and found religion to be the best medicine.” Ah, but did you have any fun, Adelina? “Well, you didn’t hear me say I didn’t fool around a lot.”
Paul Marcus of Denver, Colorado made it to 101 by clocking into his local gym three times a week, even in his final year. Marcus says the secret to longevity is pure luck. “Sure, you gotta have good genes,” he told the Denver Post. “But mostly you gotta be god-damned lucky for 100 years. You know how much crap there is out there than can get you? Plenty. Crooks, runaway buses, terrible diseases. Also, try not to eat anything that’s healthy. I eat whatever I want. The secret to longevity is ice cream.”
What Goes Up Must Come Down? Not Necessarily.
Through thick and thin, amid wars, pestilence, famine and the White Sox Scandal, the graph of global life expectancy has risen as smoothly as an ethereal escalator, despite China. That nation lost four million people in the 1931 floods, another two million in the Yellow River overflows of 1887, not to mention 830,000 in the Shaanxi earthquake of 1556 and another 665,000 in the Tangshan quake of 1976. Call them clumsy, but the Chinese have persevered and now boast a record high population of 1,439,323,776, not counting a few curmudgeons who didn’t send in their census papers. But what would happen over there if everybody started living to 100? What would happen here in the good old U.S.A.?
First of all, we’d have far more developments like The Villages, where centenarians rollerskate down to the town squares at night to pick up loose women, of which there is currently no shortage. Slicked up residents in wifebeaters and Levis would cruise the hoods in shiny old restored Mustangs and Chevy Belairs, leaning on ooga horns. Second, the music industry would see a dramatic explosion of wretched cover bands celebrating the nostalgic offerings of the second half of the 20th century. Marty Jourard would replace Dick Clark as host of American Bandstand Redux, as spinning seniors collapsed to the music. Walgreen’s and CVS, ubiquitous enough now, would spring up on every block, like Starbucks in Manhattan. Stock in Depends would shoot up like a rocket and the company would introduce Depends Xtra for customers on the far side of the century mark.
Finally, Bill Killeen would be elected president by the enormous block of oldsters invigorated by his promise of “A bong in every living room, a sidecar scooter in every garage.” No fool he, Killeen would immediately appoint Willie Nelson Secretary of Agriculture and Dolly Parton Ambassador to the United Nations. The United States would lead the world into a new international renaissance during which valued concepts like Truth, Justice and blacklight rooms would be restored. On Sundays, the churches would dole out tiny tabs of LSD-lite to their parishioners, who would then have the opportunity to dance naked around maypoles. (For the non-partakers, blindfolds would be optional.)
Last, but not least, the Olympics would be replaced every four years by a gigantic Woodstock-like musical festival for which the clouds would be seeded, mud would be guaranteed and a Guinness World Record-sized medical tent would be provided. Rod (The Biker) Bottiglier and an elite crew of ex-Hell’s Angels would provide half-hearted security. Instant hookups would be provided by Hippies Were Us and on-the-spot marriages performed by His Holiness Daniel Levine, ordained minister of the Universal Life Church. It’s a lot to remember, so don’t forget to mark your calendar. See you at the doobie toss.
That’s all, folks….
bill.killeen094@gmail.com
