Last
week’s column was started at 10 a.m., interrupted several times in the writing
by Post Office visits, deliverymen, phone calls and checking of notes, finally
going to press just before 6:30 p.m. I
had a cup of yogurt for lunch while editing photographs. Whereas the normal column has between 1700
and 2100 words, this one had almost 4000.
Siobhan said I should have made two columns out of it but, being a
master of planning, I had no idea it would extend so long. I’ll try not to let it happen again.
Anyway,
more people read this column than any other, even exceeding the vast hordes who
read The 100th Column. What
this could mean—although the chances
are laughably remote—is that the average reader would prefer to look at pictures
of nature rather than pictures of Bill.
If that’s truly the case, everybody will be thrilled to discover we’ve
inserted a new batch in this week’s column.
Remember to double click the slide show photo below the upper shot of
Siobhan to get your enlargements.
Since
a few people have actually referred to our little travelogues when travelling
out west, we’d like to add a couple of notes.
First, in Kalispell, the North Bay
Grille, downtown on 1st Avenue, is probably the best restaurant
in town. Several miles down the road on
the way to Glacier in the otherwise undistinguished town of Columbia Falls lies
an unexpected treat called the Three
Forks Grille, located in the old downtown area, which would be a triumph in
any city.
On
driving in Glacier National Park: get to your preferred parking area early or
you won’t find a space. The Logan’s Pass
area is particularly difficult and there is no other option nearby. Many of the trailheads at the side of the
Going To The Sun Road have very few spaces.
A better plan is to park at Apgar and use the free park shuttles. They arrive frequently and will take you
almost anywhere.
You’re Not Paranoid If
They’re Really Out To Get You
Shortly
after the publication of last week’s column which included the exciting
adventure at the Thronson Motel, we got this eye-opener from our friend, Torrey
Johnson:
Hi Bill,
Wonderful pictures and a great
story. We’ll compare notes on Glacier
next time I see you. Awhile back, I
spent a night in Babb, also. My car was
broken into even though I parked right outside my room. Can’t say if it was the same place or not.
Oh,
it was the same place alright. There ARE
no other hotels or motels in Babb, nor much or anything else for that
matter. We do appreciate the validation
of our paranoia. Later on, we got the
following from reader Court Lewis:
Your episode in Montana was
strangely remindful of an experience I had when my wife and I were on our
honeymoon in 1988. We ran into a
snowstorm at night crossing the Savoie Mountains on the Swiss/French
border. After a long, slow, tough drive,
we happened on a roadside motel called the Hotel Axel. There were NO other guests and the desk clerk
was a creepy, smarmy guy with a big hulky thug-like sidekick sitting behind
him. The clerk usked us, “Where did you
park your car? Can you leave your keys
with me in case we have to move it?” I
told him no.
They put us in a room at the end of
the hall with windows opening onto a big cornfield. We both started to get a weird,
hairs-standing-on-end kind of feeling but we didn’t say anything. Later, we were lying in bed, staring at the
ceiling, hearts pounding, and my wife asked, “Do you feel anything funny about
this place?” I said, “Yeah, I don’t like
it.” She said, “Let’s get out of here.”
This is all happening around two in
the morning and it’s snowing heavily outside, roads maybe blocked, but I knew
we had to do it. I looked in the phone
book and found a hotel in a nearby town.
I called the front desk and asked for an outside line. The clerk asked, “Why, who are you going to
call?” By that point, I was pissed. I said, “I’m calling the States, just get me
a line.” He hung up. We got our stuff together in three minutes
flat and made a plan. We would rush our
luggage to the vestibule together, I would get between her and the front desk
while she ran out to the car, unlock it and get in with the small bags. I would then lug the bigger bags out, throw
them in the trunk and we’d get out of there—assuming the car doors weren’t
frozen shut and the snow wasn’t too deep to move in.
We ran up to the front and both guys
stood up, staring at us. I threw some
money at the desk clerk and said, “we’re checking out!” He said, “Why? The boss will be very angry.” I said, “Too bad,” and hauled ass out the
door. Luckily, we got started and got to
the other hotel okay. I never knew
whether we were just needlessly paranoid or not but we both felt as strong a
spooked feeling as either of us had ever experienced. Yep….trust your gut!
Who
knew about the hidden dangers of hotels?
It’s bad enough when you’ve got to worry about the other guests, let
alone the eerie management.
Reviewing The Parks
Surprising
as it may seem, most folks from this part of the country don’t travel out west
much. Those who do ask us a lot of
questions about the various national parks, thus the following information in
the order of places visited.
We
visited the Grand Canyon after a
two-night stay in Las Vegas, about five hours driving time away. We stayed in the little town of Williams,
Arizona, about an hour from the park.
There are hotels closer to the park and lodges inside but reservations
for most of these must be made a year ahead.
What
can we tell you about the Grand Canyon that you don’t already know? It’s endlessly beautiful and impressively
vast. There are numerous hikes down
well-travelled trails and a few others not so well-travelled. There is also the option of descent by
mule. We hiked the Bright Angel Trail, the canyon’s most walked and the South Kaibab Trail, steeper and
narrower (ask Siobhan), less travelled with better views. The difference between hiking in the Grand
Canyon and almost anywhere else is that in most places you are doing the work
at the beginning of the hike when you’re fresh as a daisy. With the Grand Canyon, you’re negotiating the
hard part at the end. You’re also out in
the hot sun with no tree coverage. First-timers
should carefully gauge their descent, always considering the return trip. A helpful park ranger put it this way: “If we have to haul you out with a
helicopter, it’s $2000.”
You
can combine a Grand Canyon trip with a visit to nearby Sedona or Flagstaff. Sedona, full of crystal shops, new agers and
mysterious “vortexes” of supposed enlightenment, is as pretty as it gets. And about as expensive. Spend the night in Williams. It’s much cheaper and they stage gunfights in
the streets. These days, some of them
could be real.
Yosemite
This
is Siobhan’s favorite park. Our friends,
John and Sharon Cinnie, combined a Yosemite trip with a visit to San Franicsco,
a nice option. We flew to Las Vegas,
drove across Death Valley National Park,
spent a night in lively Bishop, California, and entered the west gate of
Yosemite mid-morning. We drove through
the beautiful Toulumne Meadows, gawked
at the iconic Half-Dome and El Capitan and stopped for a few
moments at Bridal Veil Falls on our
way to the Groveland Hotel about an
hour west of the park. This is probably
the most significant deficit with Yosemite—there are few places to stay
anywhere near the park and the lodges inside are not wonderful. The park, itself, is great. Uncommonly beautiful, landscapes constantly
changing, trails everywhere, Yosemite offers endless diversion. I had the memorable (and very challenging)
experience of climbing up the Mist Trail,
past Vernal and Nevada Falls, then on up to the 400-foot climb straight up
Half-Dome. If you are going to climb
Half-Dome, you’d better be seriously motivated.
Otherwise, you’ll quit. I paced
myself, partnered up with a couple of reluctant co-climbers and slowly made the
ascent. On the way up, I passed several
people who decided they could not make it to the top and were too scared to go
back down. They were sitting down,
gripping the iron poles which emanate from the rock, waiting for some unlikely
form of salvation. This is not the
rock-climbing wall at your local gym.
Yellowstone & The
Tetons
These
two are so close you might as well make a double-header of the trip. We stayed on the west side of the park for
the most part in the town of West Yellowstone, which, with a little theater,
several decent restaurants and shops and an IMAX theater, offers more to do
than most parkside retreats.
Many
people go to Yellowstone for the thermals, especially the Old Faithful Geyser.
Adjacent to Old Faithful is a boardwalk leading to several other geysers. Not far away is the colorful Grand Prismatic Spring, not to mention
a prodigious array of bubbling mud pots and other curious thermal sights. On the northern side of the park, near
Gardner, Montana, you’ll want to visit Mammoth
Hot Springs, a large complex of hot springs on a hill of travertine,
created over thousands of years as hot water from the spring cooled and
deposited calcium carbonate.
Yellowstone
is the best place we’ve visited for viewing wildlife, much of which is visible
from your car. It’s almost like the elk
and bison appear on schedule at various ports of call. If you get lucky, you may spot some of the
famous Yellowstone wolves, reintroduced into the park in 1995 after an absence
of 70 years. If you get real lucky, the wolves may not be
standing next to you.
Take
a right at West Thumb (really) and the Tetons
are just down the road and they are gigantic and spectacular, visible from
great distances. Headquarters for Teton
country is the city of Jackson Hole, a little rich for our blood, but
containing several peripheral motels which are affordable and actually come
with—get this now—different keys for
every room! What a concept.
Zion Park & Bryce
Canyon
In
the southern corner of Utah, couple hours north of Las Vegas, is the less-visited
but just as jaw-dropping kingdom of Zion, a red rock phenomenon that offers
something none of the other parks can.
The Zion Narrows hike, in and
around the north fork of the Virgin River, is a 16-mile journey in ankle to
waist-deep water running between canyon walls often 1000 feet high. There will be no $2000 helicopter rescue here,
you’re on your own. The hike takes an
average of 13 hours if you begin in the colorful tributaries of the
Virgin River at Chamberlain Ranch, so starting very early in the morning is a
good idea. So is a strong pole to plumb
the depths and keep you upright and a pair of water shoes to let the river
out. We did this hike in a little over 12
hours and we were TIRED, man. But it was great.
Zion
also offers plenty of challenging hiking trails into the surrounding hills. The small town of Springdale just outside the
park has a good number of places to stay.
Bryce Canyon, not far down the road is the home of the famous “hoodoos,”
tall, skinny spires of orange and red rock that protrude from the bottom of
arid basins and “broken” lands. Hoodoos have
a variable thickness and are often described as having a “totem pole-shaped
body.” While present in a few other
areas, nowhere in the world are they as abundant as in the northern section of
Bryce. If you are staying at Bryce, you
WILL be staying at Ruby’s because there is no other option. Ruby’s is reasonable, though, and is
practically a self-contained resort, with its shops, restaurants and even its
own post office. When we were there,
there was a nightly “rodeo” across the street.
Ruby probably owned the horses.
Wassup With The
Horses?
Cosmic
Cown is in the second—a five furlong turf test—Saturday at Calder. Last time she raced on grass, she was a
struggling fourth on a yielding track.
We’d be better off on a hard track or, better yet, a dirt track if the
race comes off the grass, which, at this time of year, is probably a 50-50 shot.
Cosmic
Flight—a.k.a. Pogo—is working well toward his first start. Only trouble is he doesn’t see the urgency in
breaking from the gate too quickly. This
is never a good thing because by the time the horse figures it out the race is
over. We told trainer Larry that it is
his job to impart knowledge of these things to his charges. He said he’s working on it. We’ll keep you posted.
And
they’re OFF! Well….most
of them, anyway.
